Blag

*insert standard offensive content, discrimination and political un-correctness disclaimer here*

<rant>

Righteo. Time for a somewhat short list, due to the fact I am typing this on a phone:

• Pommy tourists who plonk their feet out on the opposite seat, and leave sand deposits everywhere they go
• Old rickety busses with no air-conditioning
• Macquarie University students (read: FOBs) who natter away on their mobile phones in languages other than English, at excessively high volumes
• Macquarie University students who decide that it is necessary to cover the person sitting in front with spittle, while undertaking the above task
• Obese people who take up both sides of the seat + obstruct the aisle (why do morbidly obese people not get a mention in the federal fire exit acts, or whatever it’s called? (Yep Sarah, that was a reference to your OCD-ness over closing stairwell doors. *Name changed to conceal identity)
• People who decide that it is acceptable to hold everyone up for 5 minutes by paying their bus fare in 5c coins
• Wankers from Epping Boys High School, who sit in the back seat making orgasm noises… for reasons unknown to me. For fucks sake kiddos, you sound even faker than the stereotypical porn stars.
• The Sydney Buses route 288 driver who decided he had the authority to conduct a bag search for illicit materials, aka hot chips. Not that he got very far. Go piss up a flagpole, asshole.
• Lazy bums with wheelie bags – if you’re old, have scoliosis/back problems or are a little kid, fine. But not 16 year old males. S
• People who urinate/defecate on bus seats
• Busses always run +/- 20 minutes of the timetable.
• The bus you desperately need to catch is pre-pay only, and you’ve run out of travel tens.

</rant>

But seriously,

*posted, while sitting on the 506 next to a 45 year old drama queen, who reeks of pesticide*

(3-Phenoxybenzyl(1RS)-cis,trans-3-(2,2-dichlorovinyl)-2,2-dimethylcyclopropanecarboxylate to be precise)

Everyone whinges about it, but I feel like I’m missing out.

SPAM!

I have 13 e-mail accounts, and I get on average a grand total of 1 spam e-mail a month across all of them. So like, what’s up with this??? I want my fair share of penis enlarger, Viagra and Nigerian 419 scam e-mails!

This blog used to get spam comments – 552 of them, gained over a period of 10 months – but even they have dried up.

Perhaps my digital identity paranoia is keeping me from the oh-so-desired offers for $20, 000, 000 USD dollars from Mrs. Doraty Sithole from Zimbabwe, whose husband was brutally murdered Robert Mugabe’s lackeys for supporting white farmers.

*scans passport and e-mails to xxxxxxxxxxxxx@gmail.com*

I can’t say I’m a fan of all the Hitler hates X rip-offs that have flooded the interwebs (notably Youtube), but I’ll give this one by mambo9jambo a plug. It shares a common ideology that unites all (sane) HSC English students, that creative writing (and HSC English for that matter) sucks. You could say, we all… belong?

*ducks fusillade of flak*

It’s good, as far as Downfall (movie) spoofs go – there are a lot of much lamer parodies out there e.g. “Hitler wants ADSL2+ in Tasmania”.

Jaycar /  Electus seems to have stocked up on surplus HDMI cables and are flogging them at dirt cheap prices:

$9.95 for a 1.8m 1.3b compliant HDMI cable – 99.99% pure copper, 24k gold plated with triple shielding. And if you buy 4+, the price drops to $6.25ea, or $5.60 for 10+

Now that’s a bargain, unlike the $129.99 Monster THX bullshit all the retailers seem to flog… like really, unless your running a 50m HDMI cable in the vicinity of a 75W FM radio transmission tower, you don’t need quad shielded, 99.997% purity OFC copper, hand terminated with 99.99% purity silver solder, Teflon dielectric, Kevlar reinforced, 24K gold plated earth first connectors, patent pending strain relief THX certified HDMI cables.

Click here for details.

Damnit.

Gotta re-evaluate the browsers again – Firefox 3.5 , Google Chrome 3 Beta, and Opera 10 Beta were all updated in the past few days.

Dunno if there are any ground breaking changes though – Firefox’s update only fixed a few security and stability issues, Opera’s was “numerous bug fixes” and a GUI update, but Chrome… well, given the number of bugs currently in it, any update is welcome.

a.k.a 32-Bit Web Browser Review

And now for a short detour in the multi-part series, onto the most extensive post I have written to date.

A few months back, I was searching for Firefox on Major Geeks (file download mirror that’s unmetered on my ISP) and came across a… let’s say, unique browser – 32-Bit Web Browser, developed by a small company called Electrasoft.

Click here to visit Electrasoft’s home page, and here for the product information page.

Seeing as I was auditioning browsers anyway, I downloaded 32-Bit Web Browser and installed it in a virtual machine to try out. The results made me cry

I didn’t even bother benchmarking it; instead, I shall endeavour to give the application a virtual anal tearing, point out it’s numerous (understatement of the year there) flaws, and why its author is a charlatan who is scamming money off unsuspecting parent and senior types who don’t know any better. Let’s just say I would rather use Lynx or Dillo, than go anywhere near 32-Bit Web Browser with a 15 foot barge pole, so to speak.

This will be a long and intensive post, so click to read more.

(There’s more text at the end, it’s not all images!)

Read the rest of this entry »

There are only a few browsers even worthy of consideration at the moment – due to lack of support, infrequent updates, security holes, performance issues etc, I’ve decided to ignore all other browsers except for the main five. Legacy browsers (e.g. Firefox 2.0, IE7, Safari 3, Netscape were excluded), and the latest versions and betas available at time of testing were used.The versions I tested were:

• Google Chrome 2.0.172.33
• Google Chrome Beta 3.0.193.0
• Opera 9.64
• Opera 10 Beta Build 1631
• Safari 4.0.2
• Firefox 3.0.11
• Firefox 3.5
• Internet Explorer 8

Aside:  FYI, I’ve long since lost all traces of browser loyalty – they’ve already wasted enough of my time and sanity for me to even bother blowing the X browser horn.

I don’t really believe in browser benchmarks – the only real way to test browsers out is to use them for a few days and monitor their performance and system resource usage.  The SunSpider and V8 “industry standard” benchmarks are utter crap – every tech blog, journal and media portal seem to toss their figures around willy nilly, yet fail to realise that both benchmarks are BIASED and UNFAIR when used to compare competing browsers. They were designed to test performance of different builds, updates, improvements and so on, not the performance of a completely different competitors product. SunSpider was developed by WebKit (the basis of Safari) as an internal benchmark, as was V8 for Google Chrome. The only “un-biased” benchmark currently available is ACID 3, but even that doesn’t really simulate real world usage.

So, I gathered 301 different websites – each laced with images, Javascript, Java applets, Flash, Shockwave, Silverlight, pop-ups and AJAX and loaded them in each browser to check for memory leaks, abnormal CPU usage and disk I/O. I then tried using each browser with 30 tabs open for a day or two each, to see how they performed over time. As a test of each browsers tagging, history and bookmark searching capabilities, I also imported my 8MB bookmarks.html (where possible).

Each browser was setup to a “usable” state – i.e. pop-up and adblocking enabled if available, dangerous javascript options disabled. All other options were left at default, as settings shouldn’t need tweaking out of the box for a browser to be usable.

Test system specs were:

• Overclocked  Intel Core 2 Quad 2.4ghz @ 2.95Ghz
• 4GB 4-4-4-12 DDR2
• 3x 250GB WD2500KS SATA Hard Disks in a RAID0 Array (used as system disk)
• Nvidia GeForce 7600GT
• Windows XP Professional SP3 32-Bit with latest patches as of 13/7/09 applied
• Norton Internet Security 2008 16.5

So by no means a slouch. Keep in mind the average PC will NOT be anywhere near as powerful.

More to come in following posts…

I am a whore for the internets. If I had the money, I’d have interwebs pipes as extensive as Paris’s sewer system connected to my house so I could stream HD videos and torrent all day, at 40Gbps via multiple redundant upstream backbone networks. Unfortunately, bandwidth costs about ~$250 per Mbit unmetered delivered via fibre, so that’s an $12,000,000 internet bill per month. Then add on installation costs of laying fibre from the nearest access point to my doorstep, priced at ~$200 per metre in suburban areas (of which 98% of that costs is for the trenchworks and council approvals), a Cisco ONS 15454 SONET backplane to terminate the Dense Wavelength Division Multiplexed fibres, with a price heading into the 6 figure range and my plan doesn’t look quite so rosy anymore…

Regardless, the web browser is still the weapon of choice when it comes to surfing the web. Interestingly enough, picking the right web browser has been a long and gruelling process for me (no really!). I have rather peculiar web browsing habits, some of which entail -

• Bookmarking and tagging any website that is remotely interesting, or possibly useful in the future – my bookmarks.html is so large that some browsers can not import it, and scrolling to the bottom of the list takes ~ 5-6 minutes.
• Looks interesting? *click* *open in new tab* – after only about 20-30 minutes, I’ll typically have 25-30 tabs open. After a day of browsing, it’s usually around the 120-140 mark. Just wait until I start opening new windows as well…
• Constantly opening and closing browsers, so the ability to “save all” tabs and “open all tabs” is VERY important
• And as a consequence of the above reason – a high performance core that can search through 8MB of bookmarks and tags, 180 days of history and handle a 800MB cache

I mentioned long and gruelling – up until now, not a single browser available was suitable, each having their own crippling flaws and perclivites. But now, with the latest wave of browser updates/releases/betas, that’s all beginning to change. Hooray, no more:

• Blue Screens of Death (BSOD) – yup, a *certain* browser forced me to reboot my PC constantly
• Massive memory leaks that would make windows page its own kernel to disk in an effort to free up RAM
• Disk thrashing as browsers try to re-open 120 tabs from the cache
• Constant tri-daily browser crashes
• Awful laggy performance worthy of sandpapering your face

Well, I compiled a list of 301 tabs of pages packed with images, Javascript, Java applets, Flash, Shockwave, Silverlight, pop-ups and AJAX and unleashed them on all the browsers I could get my hands on. The results may surprise you…

More to come in the following posts.

(By the way, I do realise my web browser usage is NOT in anyway representative of most users, but the debilitating flaws in some browsers would still affect the average granny, logging into her ISP e-mail once a week to check for messages from the kids).

Bleurgh. As you may or may not know, I hate social networking with a passion.

(I think I posted on this a while ago. Did I? Yes I did. I did so here!)

It eats into people’s lives, cutting them off from reality, breaking up relationships, running up huge phone and Internet bills and so on, not to mention the fact that once it’s posted, it’s out there for the world to see. Now throw in online predators, e-mail harvesting by SPAM bots, the 101 trojans and phishing scams that seem to plague Facebook and MySpace and you might begin to understand why people might be better off without it.

Actually, as a side note, I read in a user survey that there is actually a demographic rift between MySpace and Facebook users. (Damnit, lost that URL ) Apparently, all the educated White people are moving to Facebook, whereas MySpace has now become a trashy ghetto. Where that leaves the Asian, European and Middle Eastern people, I’m not quite sure. Well, I do have SOME idea – Asians have their own non-English forums and Web 2.0 SN websites, Europeans have their own ripoffs of Facebook written in gobbledygook, and the Internet is the tool of the devil used to disseminate vile pornography (according to the crackpot clerics anyway) so that leaves out most of the Middle East. And yes, I hate political correctness. And no, I will not make any attempt to censor myself, not for the sake of sheltered children nor radical far left Christians nutters either.

Side Note #2 – I hate you Fred Nile. You too, Stephen Conroy. May you rot in hell for eternity Fred Phelps.

Back on topic though. The idea of social networking DOES make sense, if you ignore the ego-flapping wars of “who has more friends on Facebook” and “I have more followers than you on Twitter”.

Speaking of Twitter – ce qui donne?

What’s the point of Twitter? According to it’s home page:

Twitter is a service for friends, family, and co–workers to communicate and stay connected through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What are you doing?

Of everyone I’ve asked (about 9), no one seems to comprehend the purpose of its existence. Of all the Twitter accounts I’ve ever looked at, all but 2 were utterly boring.

“OMG woke up and it was raining”

“my dog shit the carpet againz”

“lol, gonan go eat brekky now”

“Awesome, saw a new ad for Hershey’s ice cream”

lolwut? Stream of consciousness brain feeds delivered straight to the web? Most of the tweets I’ve seen aren’t even properly formed sentences. My mind is boggled – how can people be hooked onto such mindless jibber-jabber? Twitter IS mainly used by our Yankee counterparts, so that does explain it’s popularity…

The concept of micro-blogging does seem intriguing though – handy for when you can’t be bothered writing out a full article, or when you’ve got a funny video/pic to share.

*grumble grumble* #rant# <anger> RAWR! </anger>

Sigh… I need to get a Facebook for uni…

May as well start now. (Or however long I can procrastinate it.) *accepts invitation to join the dark side*

Oh dear.

The animal huggers (is that the right term?) are all up in arms again because Barack Obama killed a fly that was pestering him during a TV interview.

Boo freaking hoo.

PETA went to all the trouble of mailing Obama a “Katcha Bug Humane Bug Catcher” humane fly catching trap and released a public statement – “We support compassion even for the most curious, smallest and least sympathetic animals. We believe that people, where they can be compassionate, should be, for all animals.”

Now hold on a sec – Obama just swatted a fly that was trying to eat his head while he was on TV. It’s not like he sprouted horns out of his head and started performing satanic fly sacrificial rituals or something. Which brings us to an interesting point. I should therefore be a sinner rotting in hell (according to PETA anyway), due to the thousands of ants, spiders, flies, cockroaches etc etc I’ve killed in my life. And pest control operators are all poltergeists, Woolworths profits from the sale of pesticides are donated to Lucifer corp, and Mortein is the mecca of evil.

Like*, GET OVER IT PETA!

There’s millions of your own species living in poverty every day under the rule of dictators, thousands fleeing war zones and all you care about are flies. For f*** sake, if you’re gonna fawn over animals, make it a decent cause at least (eg bile bears, caged chicken farming, whaling and so on…).

*adds 5c coin to the ‘like’ jar.

With more and more celebrities being vat grown every day from magic shrooms, it does take a fair bit of effort for a celebrity to differentiate themselves from the pack of zombies.

Either that, or become a Scientologist like Tom Cruise – voted #1 Tool by Australians in a 2009 survey. (Amy Winehouse was the #1 Toolette BTW).

Cassie (some RnB singer who no one gives a shit about) has sunk to a new low though. Nude pictures of her were leaked onto the Internet, probably by her publicist. Then in a strategic move, this was posted to her twitter account soon after:

“IT SEEMS THAT SOMEONE HAS HACKED INTO MY COMPUTER…THAT’S REAL FOUL AND EVIL. NOW STOP ACTING LIKE YOU HAVEN’T SEEN A TITTY BEFORE.”

And the day after, another close up pic of her downstairs was “leaked” onto the Internet.

And then a team of lawyers representing her subsequently cease & desisted every website displaying the photos and asked they be replaced with the supplied more “artistic” bikini shots.

Smooth going there.

Funnily enough, Atlantic Records/Bad Boy Entertainment have made a copyright claim for Cassies “titties”. Is that even contractually legal?

On another note, have some pictures of Cher in a see through bodysuit at age 62: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1180394/Cher-turns-time-slip-body-suit-wore-17-years-ago–looks-amazing.html Not exactly hot, but good looking for a granny if you’re into that kinda thing… (Stumbling on pictures of a 62 year old Cher at 3am is creepy)

Those two self obsessed wannabe minger Samanda Twins are at it again – what it is their strutting around in the spotlight like retarded gorillas for I’m not sure, but after raping the music industry with their one hit wonders, I can’t wait for one of them to break a nail. *gasp! End of the world!*

Woo! Swine Flu is coming to a person near you!

Or so the snake oil peddlers want you to think anyway. There seems to be no end of pharmacies selling “Swine Flu masks” on the cheap, or selfish idiots that stockpile anti-virals so that people who require them are unable to acquire them as they’ve been sold out. Also, I declare Jihad upon the unscrupulous GPs handing out Tamiflu prescriptions by the hundred to make some extra moolah.

Anyone for a dose of Swine Flu and MRSA preventing herbal supplements? Click here.

That looks just as effective as a dose of multivitamins twice a day, which would probably be cheaper.

Seeing as we’re in such a swine-ish mood, why not buy a few souvenir T-Shirts? Available here.

Speaking of snake oil peddlers, I never ceases to amaze people who buy “Magic Ceramic Water Filters”, guaranteed to filter out the secret chemicals added to the water supply by our governments to give citizens cancer, as a method of population control.

Same with “magic power magnetic bracelets” and shaman amulets to ward off terrorists. (Would a AK-47 not be more effective?)

I’m about to fork out $49.99 to buy a set of audio tapes developed by the Shaolin monks, which supposedly help cure common colds with the recorded auditory signals developed over countless millenia in temples and now available as a limited edition CD set with free gift if I buy now within the next 10 minutes.

Ohhh, I can’t wait…

Anyone wanna talk me out of it? I accept THX/Monster speaker cables as donations.